Tag Archives: #lgbtq

Hey Mr. President, erase this.

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image.png“Sex means a person’s status as male or female based on immutable biological traits identifiable by or before birth,” the department proposed in the memo, which was drafted and has been circulating since last spring. “The sex listed on a person’s birth certificate, as originally issued, shall constitute definitive proof of a person’s sex unless rebutted by reliable genetic evidence.” — New York Times, October 22, 2018

No. Just, no.

Mr. President, you don’t get to pretend like transgender people don’t exist. You don’t get to diminish them, dismiss them, or degrade them. They are PEOPLE, damnit, with hearts and hopes and dreams of being who they were born to be. And you, Mr. Narrow-minded, do not get to say they are anything other than real, equal, and deserving of every human right you enjoy.

I do not understand. I cannot comprehend. And I cannot condone the notion that gender is strictly biological.

I have been honored to meet too many people who were born in the wrong body and were forced for years to live as someone they were not, simply because their anatomy dictated it. Once they had the opportunity to live their truth, they were happy, fulfilled, and free. No one, not even the leader of the free world, should have the right to take that from them. The ripple effects of this way of thinking – from banning trans troops from serving in the military to healthcare impacts and the educational roadblocks it will put in place – are dangerous and precedent-setting. And just plain wrong.

Mr. Trump, have you met anyone who is trans? Have you heard their story? Have they told you how different their life has been since they were able to live their truth? My guess is no. Or if so, you weren’t listening. Because there is no way on God’s green earth that you’d consider this action if you had.

As a proud ally, I stand with every person under the rainbow. As a human, I stand with every other member of humanity. Because I have a heart.

Do you?

 

 

 

Cville #Pride — My New Happy Place

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I didn’t wanna go. I really, really didn’t want to go.

It was Saturday morning. We were expecting yucky weather all day thanks to Hurricane Florence, and I was thinking about how horrible it would be to stand outside in a tent in the rain trying to tell people why they should buy my book — all while attempting to keep said book safe and dry. Let’s face it: no one likes a soggy read.

So I debated skipping the whole thing. I’d already paid for the table, so that was water under the bridge at that point. (Pardon the hurricane-based humor, folks.) I couldn’t imagine that the weather would encourage people to attend, so not only would I be miserable, but how well could I really expect do in sales given the forecast?

But if I *didn’t* go, I was guaranteed not to sell anything.

It took just about everything in me to drag my lazy rear end to the car and make the 20-minute drive to Charlottesville. I kept telling myself, “I’ll just set up the table and stay for a little while. That gives me a chance to see how the turnout is. If it’s a ghost town, I’ll let myself leave early.” It gave me something to hold onto besides an umbrella.

I am so, so glad I went. Not only did it not rain, but it turned out to be my most successful event EVER. Crowds were there in droves despite the forecast. And I SOLD OUT OF BOOKS. I even sold more after I sold out, with people being willing to pay on the spot and let me ship them their book on Monday.

This was the one-year anniversary of launching my book, Who Am I If You’re Not You? Cville Pride was the first event where I sold books and I’ve spent the past 12 months marketing it near and far. A year of ongoing effort, care, thought, and persistence.

On Saturday, it all came home to roost. One attendee bought a copy last year and told me how glad she was to see that I’m still out there spreading the message. Several told me they’d heard about the book through this AMAZING video courtesy of HeartThreads. (If you haven’t seen it yet, it’s five minutes that will reaffirm your belief in love. I promise.) Some had seen the book in Barnes & Noble. Some had heard about it when I spoke on-air with WINA. Knowing that the marketing is working — that people are hearing about this book — made all the work worth it.

At Pride last year, I knew a couple of people but the vast majority were strangers to me. This year I saw so many friends I’ve had the fortune to meet over the past 12 months. And I met all kinds of new friends, people who represent every part of the community. Gay. Straight. Trans. Bi. Nonbinary. Asexual. Teens. Adults. Kids. Grandparents. It was a snapshot of life that day, and every encounter was about love, acceptance, and inclusion.

I couldn’t have been happier — not just because I sold so many books, but because it affirmed exactly why I wanted to write this story in the first place. The book is about love, and so is Cville Pride. Hats off to the organizers. I’m already looking forward to next year.

Charlottesville has more pride than hurricanes. And love? Never doubt it: we’ve got that in spades.

The Alphabet is Changing

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First of all, HAPPY PRIDE!!!!

Secondly, I want to talk about letters. (I know, I’m a writer. I always want to talk about letters! But this is different.) I didn’t know until I started this blog how many in the LGBT community think the “T” has no place in this group because “T” has to do with gender, not sexuality. I was truly stymied, and I blogged about it at the time.

This week, I saw a comment from someone saying the “B” in LGBT might also need to be rethought. Why? Because some people see more than two genders.

In today’s world, we’re learning so much about how people view themselves, and the spectrum is vast, friends. No longer do we recognize just “male” and “female,” so an argument could be made that “bisexual” doesn’t cover it all.

Interesting.

I wish we didn’t have to have the labels. I wish it didn’t matter, and that the world didn’t feel the need to categorize people based on anything — from race to religion to gender to sexual preference. But as long as that’s the case (and I suspect that’s not changing any time soon), I’m curious to see whether “LGBT” morphs into a different set of acronyms. I wonder what the “B” should become. “P” for pansexual? Maybe “A” for all?

Whatever happens with this, I’m supportive. I hope it’s clear I’m an ally all the way. Just keep me up to speed so I don’t show my ignorance! I’m trying hard to keep up my image 🙂

I don’t have a dog in this fight, I just find it worth discussing. I can definitely see how it makes sense.

What do you think?

 

Gold before the Olympics begin

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Feathered Quill logoThere is no way to say this without sounding like I’m bragging, so I’m just gonna say it:

I won a gold medal!

Well, okay, *I* didn’t win a gold medal, but the book I wrote did. That may be splitting hairs. I’m gonna go ahead and claim it!

I found out that “Who Am I If You’re Not You?” won first place for memoirs in the 2018 Feathered Quill Book Awards! I couldn’t be more proud, and not just because I can now call it an award-winning book, but because it’s resonating with readers. Here’s what the Feathered Quill judges had to say:

“This is a well-written memoir on a topic that people don’t see much of on the library/store/online book shelves. A must-read and valuable addition to LGBTQ collections. This book scored a perfect 100 from the cover to the content. Excellent job!”

That line – “a valuable addition to LGBTQ collections” – probably means the most to me. To feel that this story can make a difference for someone, that it merits space on their shelves, speaks volumes. It reinforces the belief I felt from the get-go: that this true story of one couple’s journey to love beyond gender was both unique and unusual. The more I researched, the more I realized just how special this real-life couple is, and I couldn’t wait to share their story with the world.

If you haven’t checked it out yet, it’s available on the book’s website and at Amazon. And as of this month, it’s also at the Barnes & Noble store in Charlottesville, Virginia, where I’ll be doing a book signing this Saturday, 2/10, from noon until 2pm. If you’re in the area, please come by and celebrate with me!

LynnThorne-Cover-fqawardAnd this is a perfect chance for me to thank the uber-talented Liz Weaver of Paprika Creative for her fantastic cover. She’s the bomb! I mean, just LOOK at this cover she designed. Seriously, look at it, and then go to her site and see what other outstanding design work she’s done.

Thank you, Liz!

 

This is me.

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I’m not a stranger to the dark

Hide away, they say

’cause we don’t want your broken parts.

I’ve learned to be ashamed of all my scars

Run away, they say

no one’ll love you as you are.

But I won’t let them break me down to dust

I know that there’s a place for us

for we are glorious.

When the sharpest words wanna cut me down

I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out.

I am brave, I am bruised,

I am who I’m meant to be.

This is me.

Look out ’cause here I come

And I’m marching on to the beat I drum.

I’m not scared to be seen.

I make no apologies.

This is me.

Another round of bullets hits my skin

Well, fire away ’cause today

I won’t let the shame sink in.

We are bursting through the barricades

And reaching for the sun.

transloveWe are warriors.

That’s what we’ve become.

Won’t let them break me down to dust.

I know that there’s a place for us.

For we are glorious.

 

When the sharpest words wanna break me down

I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out.

This

is

me.

From The Greatest Showman. Lyrics by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul

 

Words have power. Banned words have consequences.

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bannedI have tried for the past 24 hours — and failed — to put my swirling thoughts into words for a blog post. I’m trying again now because my mind can’t rest until I get this out there.

It’s the 21st century. What kind of country are we living in where top public health experts can be banned from using words in official documents?

More specifically, what kind of country are we living in where words that define HUMAN BEINGS can be banned?

Beginning with “fetus,” the very definition of life. This new list of banned words would have us do away with this term as though it were dirty or dangerous. If anyone cared, they’d realize it was science-based. Oh, wait…

And moving on to include “diversity,” “vulnerable,” and the one that hit me hardest: “transgender.”

So we should no longer use the word “transgender.” We should pretend as though it doesn’t exist. As though it has no worth, value, or meaning.

It was bad enough when government websites removed information relating to the LGBT community when someone (I’m banning his name) took office. Now the very term is banned?

What does this mean? Are those who are trans suddenly invisible? You ban the word and, POOF!, they cease to exist?

Reading the list of banned words for the first time, I started off appalled, then shocked. Today, I am beyond outraged. My emotions regarding this “list” are all over the place. I’m sickened, saddened, and heartbroken that in the greatest country in the world — supposedly based on the principle of free speech — we have a list of words that are verboten. That the list includes words that describe very real, very human, people I know and care about is beyond my comprehension.

The vice president of Planned Parenthood called the list “reckless” and “unimaginably dangerous.”

You must be able to acknowledge the humanity of transgender people in order to address their health care needs. You cannot erase health inequities of people of color simply by forbidding the use of the words “vulnerable” or “diversity.” — Dana Singiser

I’m still sorting this all out (as you can tell), but in the meantime, I want to leave you with something I read on Facebook that was beautifully written. I don’t know the author, Elena Sands, but I hope she won’t mind me including it here. It was so apt.

The evidence- and science-based facts are that you are wrong. Free speech is our entitlement and diversity is our strength. You will not oppress my transgender family without consequences. You are so desperate to save a fetus against a woman’s wishes, yet fail miserably to help needy children once they’re born. The only vulnerable thing here is your propaganda. You cannot silence us.

We are worthy. Every one of us. Our diversity makes us stronger, and that includes the transgender community, those who are LGBT, and those who are marginalized in any way.

We are all vulnerable right now. God help us.

#iAMPROUD of you!

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Today’s guest post comes from Charlotte Summers, who is behind a global movement to be proud of gender and sexuality. While writing blog posts for thatswhatlynnsaid, more than once I’ve been disheartened by the treatment of the LGBTQ+ community. From bullying to suicide, homelessness to violence, and helplessness to hopelessness, I have wished I could do more than just shed some light on the pain this group endures.

Screen Shot 2017-12-04 at 3.58.52 PMThen I heard about Charlotte’s efforts with #iAMPROUD, and I asked her to let me share this project with you in hopes of giving it more visibility and giving a stronger voice to those who identify as LGBT.

You can learn more about #iAMPROUD through Charlotte’s words below. And in case I haven’t told you lately, #iAMPROUD to be an ally!

______________________________________________________________________

Understanding your sexuality or gender is a long and scary journey.

How will my family perceive me?  Will all of my friends turn against me? What will everyone say about me?

Many valid questions whizz around your head & it all gets too much. When you finally come out, you could get mixed reactions. You see, some get it easy, others don’t. But that’s part of life.

Many of us for years are ashamed of our sexuality/gender as the stigma attached is too much to handle. But this needs to stop, we need to be proud of who we are. No matter sexuality, gender, race, religion and so on. We should all stand proud.

We want to showcase how amazing LGBTQ+ individuals are & we are going to share the worldwide.

The #iAMPROUD project highlights how amazing we all are. From discrimination, hate crimes and daily judgement we still stand proud as ever.

For the younger generations and those struggling with their gender,  they will see us unashamed and owning our sexuality/gender.

And this is what they need. With increasing percentages of young children being bullied at school for their sexuality, they need us to stand up for them and say ‘ We are LGBTQ+ and proud.’

To help us achieve this, there are two ways you can join the movement. 

1. Take a picture of yourself with the hashtag ‘iAMPROUD’ with your sexuality, gender or identity.

Then follow the simple rules below:

  1. Tag us on Instagram at @iamproudd
  2. Use the hashtag #iAMPROUD

(For example: ‘Bisexual & Proud’ with #iAMPROUD below)

That’s it! You will be featured on our gallery as well as on Instagram!

2. Email us your coming out story.  Share your story to the world & show us all how proud you are to identify within the LGBTQ+ community. Our email is Uniteuk1@gmail.com

I hope you join us on our journey in being proud of who we are.

Learn more at https://prouduk.wordpress.com/2017/11/28/get-involved/

 

A woman without the history … but with all the knowledge she needs

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I love to feature guest bloggers and today I’m featuring my new friend Donna Price. She posted the below on Facebook and I asked her if I could share it here with you. I found her insights fascinating and I hope you will too.

Btw, Donna was recently honored by Out magazine as one of their Top 100 for 2017! She’s an open and proud transwoman, and I’m grateful to call her my friend. Enjoy her musings…

Fiscal year, calendar year,

Mammograms,

Black Friday…

I received a notice in the mail that it was time to schedule my annual mammogram. I checked online to ensure that my insurance would pay for an annual screening. I called the clinic, and was surprised that they could fit me in the next week.

I arrived at 7:00am this morning for my annual screening mammogram. Anticipating it would be a quiet – day after Thanksgiving – morning that was true for the greater building, but not for the Mammography/Breast clinic as there were a number of us women present.

One woman was coming out of a night of food poisoning from, she believes, a turkey her hostess had let thaw and sit out too long before cooking, another exhausted before seeing mental health patients herself the rest of the day. I asked if she had done any work at The Women’s Initiative and she replied she had done her internship there.

Though having one’s breasts squished and squeezed is not a pleasant feeling there is a decidedly positive aspect as a transgender woman, for needing a mammogram.

Arriving at a women’s clinic, is such a reinforcing feeling for a transgender woman. Filling out the forms, however, is a reminder of how different the woman I am from those born with female bodies: no date of first and last menstrual period, no number of pregnancies, no number of live births, no date of hysterectomy, no record of when I experienced typical female gynecological medical issues…

Called back for my screening the nurse had some questions for me. I started to explain that I am a post-op transgender woman…to which she replied she did not care about any of that, but it had been less than 365 days since my last mammogram, so my insurance would not cover it. Calendar year scheduling on a fiscal year insurance plan…no worries, I replied, I’ll be back in a couple of weeks…

So I left to go to Lowe’s for some Black Friday tool shopping. I had given almost all my tools away to the kids a few years ago and needed to replace some. The salesman seemed surprised by my knowledge of single and double bevel compound mitre saws and immediately warmed up to my requests for assistance

A final stop at Belks for a new evening gown and my shopping is complete for the day…not being a typical woman has both advantages and disadvantages…you just have to roll with life…

Transgender Awareness Week

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Transgender_Pride_flag

Happy Trans Awareness Week! This is a time to raise the visibility of transgender and gender non-conforming people and the issues these groups face.

It’s a big week in the community, and it ends on Friday with Transgender Day of Remembrance (TDOR), in observance of those who’ve lost their lives to violence and hatred against them. To learn more about it, visit the TDOR website.

It’s also an important week for me personally as I launch my book tomorrow! Who Am I If You’re Not You? is centered around a same-sex couple facing a gender transition, and their journey to weather the change and all it entails. I’ll be holding a launch party and am excited to get this book officially out into the public!

Whether you’re a member of the trans community or an ally, please do something this week to acknowledge those who are transgender and gender non-conforming. Check out GLSEN’s website, or GLAAD also has a list of ways to support and mark the occasion.

Happy Trans Awareness Week!

OrionWisdom and me

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I’m so excited! As my book, Who Am I If You’re Not You? draws closer to launch, there’s all kinds of exciting things happening. Some of it has been planned for awhile, like my upcoming booksigning events at AFK Books in Virginia Beach, VA and at The Abbey in West Hollywood, CA. I’ve also been planning the Nov. 14 launch party at Over The Moon Books and Artisan Gallery in Crozet, VA for a couple of months.

But today I got a wonderful surprise when my book was reviewed/featured in this wonderful newsletter, OrionWisdom. Check it out and subscribe, if you’ve a mind to. Elisabeth Fitzhugh pens this digital newsletter full of thoughts to help you consider your personal spiritual perspective. I was delighted to be included in this month’s issue, and I continue to be humbled by those who believe in and support this book right alongside me. Thanks Elisabeth!

As I gear up for the launch, I’m looking for other ways to publicize this book. Who do you know who might be able to help its message reach those who need to hear it? Can you help me spread the word by sending out an email, or putting something on social media for me? Or maybe you’d consider sharing this blog with someone who’d be interested. I strongly believe someone, somewhere out there, needs to read this book and I want to make sure I’ve done everything I can to get it to them–but I also know I can’t do it alone. Thanks for helping me give this book wings to fly.

Here’s to our journey together. Cheers!